Jeff - RIP (Dec. 29-30)

I'll never forget receiving the call at my office from the Peoria Police Department, asking if I am 'the brother of Jeffrey Caruthers?'

My instincts immediately told me it was bad - real bad.

They told me nothing, but asked me to go to Jeffery's apartment.  It was the longest 20 minute drive of my life.  Calling my father and sister after seeing Jeff was even worse.

I've long-since reconciled Jeffrey's death in my mind, but I'll never forget the feelings I had on that day - NEVER!

What I haven't reconciled is the answer to that first question from the police:  Was 'I the brother of Jeffery Caruthers?'

I most definitely am.  I just wish I had been a better brother.  I wish I knew more about his demons.  Actually, I wish I had taken the time to listen and to act on what I did know.

I miss you Jeff.  I love you BROTHER!

FYI:  Anyone who noticed I spelled Jeff/Jeffery/Jeffrey's name different ways shouldn't think it was a mistake...It still makes me laugh knowing Patty spelled it differently on many of the things we found in Jeff's apartment 🙂