HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

"If you are going to have children, you should want to be a good father.  If you want to be a good father, the best way to ensure it happens is to be a good husband." - Jay Caruthers

Those who know me well, and those who follow my blogs regularly, know I consider myself to be a product of five amazing women:  Melissa (wife), Jackie (mother), Krissi (sister), Holly and Brooklyn (daughters).

But there have been a few men who have made a difference in my life, as well - a father and virtual father figures.  I've only made mention of a few in the past, so on this Father's Day I'm going to make note of all of them...I have not seen or spoken to most of them in decades.  If anyone who reads this knows of them please forward this post - I would love for them to know how much they have meant to me.

There is also a woman I have never made mention of.  I will do so here, because she filled a similar void in my life as many of those listed.

Jim Caruthers:  My father.  My first hero.  Like many fathers and sons, our relationship has seen its ups and downs over the years.  I'm glad it's is better at this point than it's been in a long time...For good, bad and otherwise I am my father's son.  I love him terribly.

Sara Dusenberry:  4th grade teacher.  My life was turned upside-down when I was 8-10 years old.  This woman took a special interest in me and helped me greatly...I can only remember the name of a one teacher from my childhood (non-coach) - I have never forgotten her.  She was special, and she made me feel special.

Paul Pierri:  Father of my best friend.  When I was 10 my mother had Krissi and I go to an after school babysitter.  I have no idea what this lady's name was;  I just know she lived in the cul de sac with the Pierris...Paul and Anne Marie had enough children to care for (nine), but they more or less took me in for the next five years.  I truly loved, idolized and idealized this family.  Theirs was the family type I wanted, and if I couldn't have it as a kid I would create it as an adult - minus seven extra kids ;)

Ron Steinberg:  Teacher and coach.  I took PE all four years in high school, and was a Teachers Aide for Coach Steinberg's classes much more often than the school would have preferred for one simple reason - I wanted to be around this man as much as possible...He knew I was troubled, and like Sara Dusenberry, he took me under his wing.  Heaven knows he wasn't a great teacher (PE and Health), but he was a great mentor.  He talked me off of many ledges.

Tom Nelson:  Father of my high school girlfriend.  I wasn't especially close with Tom (much closer to his wife Pam); in fact I was terrified of him.  But I didn't want him to think I was a complete punk, either...I was like many unguided, bored, teenage boys - I was destructive.  But there were many times when I thought about what I was going to do (mostly break and steal stuff, and being mean and cruel to others) and this man's name often came to my mind.  He was the reason I didn't do some bad things.  His was also the name that came to my mind when I did do bad things - hoping he never found out.

Sgt. William Oxford:  Basic Training instructor.  'Ox' was nowhere near what Basic Training/Boot Camp instructors are portrayed as in the movies or on TV.  He was hard and demanded excellence, but he opened up in the 'Day Room' and knew how to reach my emotions and intellect at the 'End of Day'...I only knew him for 42 days, and I was one of probably thousands of Basic Trainees he had, but his imprint on me is strong and permanent - specifically when it comes to 'responsibility', 'sacrifice', 'reliability', and 'loyalty.'

Rich Karlin:  Father-in-law.  This is truly the most decent, gentle and kind person I've ever met.  He is a giant of a man in my mind for so many reasons - mostly because in watching and talking to him I was shown that it's not weakness to be kind...I can only hope to be as loved and revered by my daughters as he is by his.  This is one of my ultimate life goals.

Dennis Prager:  Mentor.  I have met Dennis one time, and he would have no idea who I am, but I've listened to and read his genius for at least the past 15 years.  He truly is an amazing man, and by far the one I know the most about on this list...He has been the most important male in my adult life - if for no other reason, because he has confirmed how important it is to be a good husband and father.  How important it is not just to my wife and daughters, but also how important it is to my own happiness.

Each of the people listed above helped get me to the point I am at in my life - it has been a great life...A great life where my happiest and proudest moments revolve around being a husband and father.

I wish this same great life for all fathers...It is possible for those who are willing to make their wife and children the center of their life through 'sacrifice', 'responsibility', 'reliability' and 'loyalty'.

It is all worth it!

Happy Father's Day.